No More Dysfunction: Functional Families Don’t Have to Be Rare

, No More Dysfunction: Functional Families Don’t Have to Be Rare

Why write a book about family life?

Years ago, shortly after I became a committed believer in Christ, I heard a message preached that rocked my world—the kind that catches you completely off guard and leaves you undone by the presence of God, knowing you will never be the same.

I was so struck by the words in Malachi 2:15, “Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth.”</em>

My years of feminist training—to reject marriage and family as a less than noble pursuit, compared to the ventures of making money or becoming famous—all melted away in a powerful encounter with God.

That encounter resulted in a complete change of pursuits for me. I was suddenly aware that this idea of family, being in God’s family and creating a godly family, was near and dear to God’s heart. Through a transformation, it became near to my heart, too. I didn’t know how to accomplish it. I just knew it was worth pursuing.

Throughout the last fifty years or more, our country lost the importance and foundation for family. Almost every problem we see today is a result of family problems and issues. Yet the more problems we have, the less focus or interest there is in family. People have become more self-absorbed, and as a result, we’ve been spiraling downward as a nation, as individuals, and as families.

It’s time to change that.

Love is the greatest thing one can experience, and love begins in a family. We were not made to have a relationship with technology or to be self-absorbed.

God made us for family—His family and the one we would create with Him.

I remember a time when we were in Taco Bell eating lunch as a family. We prayed over our food, ate, and talked. Afterward, a couple approached Gary and me. The lady had tears welling in her eyes.

“I’ve never seen a family like yours,” she said. “The whole meal my husband and I couldn’t do anything but watch your family. I’ve never seen kids get along with their parents like yours, or talk and get along with one another so well. What’s your secret?”

We had an opportunity to share God’s love with that woman. We didn’t have to go to her table and preach to her. Our family opened a door for us to witness simply by being ourselves.

People want good families.

How sad that a functional family is an anomaly, a rarity.

That’s why your family needs to shine in this time. The light shines brightest in the greatest darkness. We aren’t a perfect family, but we tried every day to cultivate an atmosphere of love and peace. Don’t expect your family to be perfect either, but cultivate an atmosphere of love and peace.

Whether people realize it or not, they yearn for the vintage family model. That’s why shows with lots of kids and family life are so popular because they give a glimpse into families that relate, that are real, and working through problems, not running from them.

Amidst so much dysfunction, people are craving healthy relationships.

It’s time to reinstate the principles of the vintage family, to protect the future of all children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, to invade the culture that is trying to twist and dilute families, and to bring in the strongest, clearest form of the family system—the one that works.

Won’t you join me?


Excerpted and adapted from Drenda’s book, The New Vintage Family.

Click here to order your copy of The New Vintage Family book.

For a LIMITED TIME, you can also get your own New Vintage Family Package, which contains Drenda’s book The New Vintage Family, as well as a teaching she did on how to take vacations with your family called Make It Fun, and more!

Click here to order your copy of the New Vintage Family Package.

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