The Consequences of Strife: Why You Should Never Allow It in Your Life
Drenda Keesee • February 14, 2024
Reading Time 2 mins 59 secs –
A stuffed toy laid in the road at the scene of the accident.
As we passed, the Lord spoke to me, “Okay, this is your last warning. Are you going to continue this? You know you are opening the door to the enemy.”
Gary and I had had a disagreement just before we had left the house for our family road trip. And there we were six hours in and we’d barely said a word to one another.
Six hours.
You think driving from Ohio to Tennessee is a long stretch of highway? Try doing it while giving someone the silent treatment.
One word: torture.
Then we passed the accident.
Gary and I both felt the same conviction when we passed it, especially because it clearly involved children.
But...
pride.
We knew what we were doing wasn’t good. (What kind of example is it to your children to ignore each other?)
But neither of us wanted to lay down our pride. I kept hearing the voice of the Lord, and I’d think,
No, I’m not going to fix this thing, because then I’ll have to talk to him.
It was almost a competition to see who could hold our grudge for the longest.
But strife is dangerous stuff.
What is strife? Drama, conflict, friction, disagreement, bickering, arguing, bad blood, disputes… whichever words you use to describe it, it’s dangerous.
Whether it’s between you and your spouse, you and your child, you and a friend, you and a family member, or you and a coworker, you don’t want to let strife remain in your life.
The Bible says that where there is strife, there is confusion and there is every evil work (James 3:16).
Our small argument between Gary and I had gone unchecked and had escalated, and neither one of us were listening to the voice of the Lord.
And there were consequences for our strife and outright disobedience.
About an hour after we passed the accident, a car pulled out in front of
our vehicle, and we were in what could have been a very serious car accident.
I started yelling the name of Jesus, and God supernaturally protected our entire family.
Initially, it looked as though there were going to be serious issues. They told us our son’s spleen might rupture. I was pregnant, and the doctors worried that I might lose the baby. Through all of these things, we stood on the Word of God, and we all came out unharmed, including the young preacher’s son who had pulled out in front of us (he was in disobedience at that moment too).
Even in the midst of this difficult situation, through our prayers, standing on God’s Word, and our children’s words to the medical personnel, we had opportunities to minister and impact the little county hospital we had to visit.
The enemy tried to take us out, but he lost.
We were responsible for opening the door to the enemy. But the name of Jesus is more powerful than our mistakes and circumstances, and that is what kept us protected.
You MUST stay on guard and not allow strife in your life, with anyone.
How? Here are just three quick tips:
Bite your tongue. You don’t have to say everything you think.- Don’t lash out or give the silent treatment. Work on communicating with others in a healthy way.
- Repent quickly and forgive quickly. Take responsibility; admit when you’re wrong. Say you’re sorry and ask for forgiveness. Don’t hold onto hurts. Forgive as you’ve been forgiven by Jesus.
Reading Time 6 mins 30 secs – I’m constantly asked the same question as I travel around the country speaking to people: “Gary, what am I supposed to do with my life? What’s my purpose?” But I’m going to tell you something right now. That’s actually the wrong question to start with. See, before we can talk about what you’re supposed to do, we need to establish who you are . We live in a world that evaluates people by what they do, not who they are. That’s completely backward from God’s perspective! This broken thinking started back in the Garden when Adam lost his identity and purpose and became a survivalist. The Earth Curse System We Grew Up In God told Adam, “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground.” —Genesis 3:17b–19a (NIV) I call this the “painful toil and sweat earth curse system.” That’s the system you and I grew up in. It creates a survivalist mentality instead of an assignment mentality. What’s the first question people ask in this system? “Where’s the money? Where’s the provision?” Adam had an original assignment—to represent God’s Kingdom on Earth and take care of God’s stuff. But he abandoned that created purpose and became a survivalist. And friend, we’ve all inherited that perverted view of life. We Need to Fix Your Identity First Now, here’s the thing. We have no business talking about your assignment or purpose until we get your identity fixed. Why? Because anything God has for you to do will be bigger than you! It’ll take more money than you have and more people than you know. It’ll take faith in God’s grace. As Ephesians 2:10 (NIV) says, “For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Our identity has been warped. Just like Adam covered himself with fig leaves, we try to cover ourselves with wealth, position, and the pride of life. We don’t want people to know the real us because we fear shame. The Prodigal Son’s Identity Crisis In Luke 15:11–24, Jesus told the story of the Prodigal Son. This is really a picture of what happened to Adam—leaving Father’s house full of provision and going to a place he thought was better, only to find it bankrupt. For the first time, this son had to be “hired.” Previously, he worked with his father in the family business. But then he had to take on an assignment that was disgusting to Jews—feeding pigs. He was totally out of position. When he finally came to his senses and returned home, what did he say? Luke 15:21 (NIV) tells us: “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’” He wanted to be made like one of his father’s hired servants. He didn’t understand who he really was! And even though the father restored him as a son, he carried this “I am not worthy” concept with him. Friend, this is what happens to us! When you feel unworthy, what do you want to do? Perform! You want to earn respect. You want people to acknowledge you’re worthy. And you perform for God. Even though we’re born again, even though we’re in Father’s house, we carry this survival mindset into our new life. And unless that is fixed, you’ll never be able to receive freely from God. Your Real Identity in Christ And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son. —Romans 8:28–29a (NIV) You’re a coheir with Christ—part of the family! What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? —Romans 8:31 (NIV) No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. —Romans 8:37 (NIV) Those are powerful statements, but it’s problematic because most people aren’t confident that God is actually for them. Religion has taught you that you’re nothing but a worm crawling in the dust. But that’s not what the Bible says! Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” —2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV) For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin—because anyone who has died has been set free from sin. —Romans 6:6–7 (NIV) You’re not a measly sinner who can’t stop sinning. You’re free from sin! Created with Divine Intent The word of the Lord came to me, saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” —Jeremiah 1:4–5 (NIV) I believe this applies to every person. Before you were created in your mother’s womb, God created you with intent. You’re not here by accident! If you have multiple children, you know they’re all different, even in the same household. Why? Because God made them for certain things and put His design in them. Unfortunately, most people never discover that because their life of survival holds them in places they were never intended to be at. You are extremely unique! So why is everyone trying to be like everyone else? Because no one knows who they really are. Your Unique Function in the Body For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. —Romans 12:4–5 (NIV) I’m not a pastor because I chose to be. I was obedient to what God said. And I’m no better than you are. I’m just standing in the place God told me to stand. You need to stand in the place God told you to stand. If all of us stand in the right place, the body will function and great things will happen! But that’s only going to happen when you understand that your function is needed. Ready for Your Mission? So, friend, before you ask what you’re supposed to do, make sure you know who you are in Christ. But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. —1 Peter 2:9 (NIV) Until you’re absolutely convinced of your identity, we don’t need to be talking about facing your Goliath. Your Goliath knows who he is. You have to know who you are! Your purpose isn’t a career choice. It comes by revelation. Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. —Proverbs 19:21 (NIV) Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. —Psalm 139:16 (NIV) Only the Creator knows why something was built. Only God knows exactly why He created you and what He designed you to accomplish. Are you ready to discover your true mission? It starts with understanding your real identity in Christ. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. —Philippians 3:14 (NIV) When you do, you’ll stop trying to survive and start thriving in your God-given purpose! Remember John 10:10b (NIV) where Jesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
Reading Time 3 mins 8 secs – Let me ask you something. Are you truly concerned about God’s business? Or are you more focused on your own? That might be a tough question, but it’s one we all have to answer at some point. The truth is, when we align our lives with God’s agenda, everything else begins to fall into place. Jesus made it clear in Luke 2:49 (NKJV) when He said, “Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s business?” He was focused. He understood that His life was about fulfilling a divine purpose, not just going through the motions of everyday existence. And guess what? The same applies to you and me. God’s Business First A lot of people are trying to build their own lives, solve their own problems, and make their own way—only to end up frustrated, tired, and lacking. But Matthew 6:33 (NIV) gives us a powerful principle: “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” That means if we take care of God’s business, He’ll take care of ours. I’ve seen this firsthand in my own life and in the lives of countless others. When we align our time, energy, and resources with what God is doing, He ensures that we never lack what we need. Provision follows purpose. Philippians 4:19 (NIV) reminds us, “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” When we prioritize His business, He supplies all we need. What Does It Mean to Be About God’s Business? Being about God’s business isn’t just about working in ministry. It means bringing Kingdom principles into everything we do—our careers, our families, our finances, and even our daily conversations. It means: Using your talents and skills to make an impact for God’s Kingdom : “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters” (Colossians 3:23, NIV). Handling your finances according to His Word, not just worldly wisdom : “Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine” (Proverbs 3:9–10, NIV). Being led by the Holy Spirit in decision-making, rather than reacting to circumstances : “For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God” (Romans 8:14, NIV). Viewing your work as a mission field, wherever you are. Stepping into Your Kingdom Assignment Too often, people are waiting for God to bless them before they take action. But that’s backward! When you step into your Kingdom assignment—when you take that step of faith and prioritize what God is doing—then provision, opportunities, and success start flowing your way. That’s how the Kingdom works. James 2:17b (NIV) tells us, “Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” God has called you to make a difference, to live with purpose, and to operate in the blessings of the Kingdom. But it starts with a choice: Will you focus on His business, or will you continue trying to figure things out on your own? Make the Shift Today If you’ve been struggling, feeling stuck, or wondering why things aren’t working, take a moment to check your focus. Are you aligned with God’s business? Are you seeking His Kingdom first? Proverbs 16:3 (NIV) encourages us, “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.” When you trust Him and put Him first, He will lead you to success. I challenge you today: Make the shift. Start putting God’s agenda before your own, and watch how He transforms every area of your life. His business is the best business to be in! Let’s go after it together! Watch the full message here: Are You Concerned About God's Business?
Reading Time 2 mins 52 secs – Have you ever felt like there’s more to life than what you’re currently experiencing? That nagging sense that you were created for something greater, yet you’re not quite sure what it is or how to step into it? You’re not alone. Many people go through life knowing deep down that they have a specific purpose—a destiny to fulfill—but they struggle to identify it and take the necessary steps to walk in it. But here’s the truth: You weren’t just saved to survive; you were saved to occupy! You were created with a unique assignment and a position of influence in this world. Your destiny isn’t just about achieving personal success; it’s about fulfilling your Kingdom purpose. Moving Beyond Deliverance to Destiny One of the biggest traps believers fall into is celebrating deliverance but never stepping into their destinies. Think about it—have you ever experienced a breakthrough in your life? Maybe you got out of debt, overcame an addiction, or walked away from a toxic situation. But instead of pressing forward, you found yourself simply enjoying your newfound freedom without any real direction. Here’s the problem: Deliverance is never permanent unless you learn to occupy! The enemy will always try to reclaim territory in your life. If you don’t move forward into your destiny, you risk falling back into old cycles. Your breakthrough is just the beginning, not the end. God didn’t free you so you could sit still. He freed you so you could step into your purpose and advance His Kingdom! Understanding Your Authority To occupy your destiny, you have to understand the authority God has given you. Too many believers live far below their potential because they don’t recognize the authority they carry. Authority isn’t about how powerful you feel; it’s about knowing your legal standing. Think about a police officer directing traffic. Cars don’t stop because the officer has the physical strength to stop them. They stop because of the badge —the authority the officer represents. It’s the same with you. Your authority doesn’t come from your abilities. It comes from the One you represent. But here’s the key: You can’t walk in authority unless you’re also submitted to authority. Finding Your Place in God’s Organizational Chart Have you ever considered where you fit in God’s organizational chart? Your destiny is directly tied to understanding your role and responsibilities in the Kingdom. Ask yourself: Where has God called me to be? What unique gifts and abilities do I bring? Who has God placed in authority over me? Who has He placed in my care? When you’re in the right place—operating within your assigned role—things work smoothly, and God’s authority flows properly in your life . The Power of Staying Submitted One of the biggest challenges in stepping into your destiny is staying submitted —especially when you disagree or face correction. Your maturity isn’t measured by your talent or your age. It’s measured by your ability to remain submitted even when it’s difficult . Think about how quickly you want to defend yourself when criticized. Do you get offended? Do you want to quit? That’s a sign of immaturity that can derail your destiny. Submission isn’t about control; it’s about protection. When you remain under authority, you position yourself for greater authority and greater Kingdom impact. Moving Forward with Confidence As you step into your destiny, God will provide everything you need —the right people, the right resources, and the right opportunities to fulfill your assignment. The double portion is already yours! When you align yourself with God’s plan and operate under His authority, you’ll find that He supplies “exceedingly, abundantly above all that you could ask or think” (Ephesians 3:20). So, are you ready to move beyond just celebrating your freedom to actually occupying your place of influence ? Your destiny is waiting. It’s time to take possession of what’s rightfully yours! What area of authority has God placed in your hands? How are you occupying that space for His Kingdom?